So it looks like Omar is done winterizing the Mets, save a possible spare part and Ohman to be named later. It’s time, then, to assess what we have and make 10 predictions for the 09 campaign.

Prediction #1: Sometime in March, the Wilpons will have the incredible luck of finding a new sponsor for the now-sponsorless Citi Field. Even more uncannily, that company will be the CIT Group. With just the deletion of a middle “I” the stadium will be dubbed CIT FIELD. The notorious commemorative patch design will not change, since, presciently, there was no Citi branding on it to begin with.

Prediction #2: On April 18, with the Brew Crew in town, the first 50,000 fans to walk through the gates will be treated to the opportunity to punch Willie Randolph in the gut, then have a sip of champagne — actually, Asti Spumanti, because “it tastes sweeter.”

Prediction #3: Sometime in May, Luis Castillo will agree to have his legs amputated for the good of the team. He will patrol the 2B bag riding an Eddie Murphy/Trading Places-esque cart. His fielding percentage will increase immediately. However, after multiple face-plants trying to make the DP pivot on wheels, he will abandon the experiment. Finally, in a last-ditch attempt to stay on through his 4-year contract, he will consent to having his arms amputated as well, and will function as the second base bag.

Prediction #4: Sometime in June, with Santana working a no-hitter into the ninth inning at CIT Field, a US Airways jet taking off from LGA will experience a bird hit. Miraculously, the jet will be piloted by one Chesley B. Sullenberger III, who will glide the crippled airliner down softly in the middle of the diamond. Santana will be killed instantly by the landing gear. The left wing will graze Ryan Church in right field, giving him a concussion. All passengers will deplane safely.

Prediction #5: On July 7, in a game with the Dodgers, ManRam will tee off on eight Mets pitchers, including Desi Relaford (who was acquired when Marlon Anderson died in his sleep). Manny will hit 7 homers, drive in 36 runs, steal home twice, and, upon catching a drive against the wall in left, leap up into the stands, high-five a fan, then deliver a baby for the fan’s in-labor wife. He’ll then glance meaningfully up at the owner’s box. Joe Torre will call ManRam “the greatest right-handed hitter in the game.” Later that day, A-Rod will slit his wrists in Central Park. Madonna will record a double-platinum tribute, “Candle In The Ass.”

Prediction #6: Sometime in August, bereft by injuries, the Mets starting outfield will be Jeremy Reed, Cory Sullivan, and the corpse of Marlon Anderson. The Phillies will pick up Adam Dunn off the waiver wire. Omar will make a statement about “liking our depth.” Some fans will bemoan the departure of Fernando Martinez and Daniel Murphy in the deadline trade for Jose Lima; others will chalk it up to a necessary move to bolster the rotation, given the tragic loss of YoYo, Oliver Perez’s mound-top nervous breakdown (yes, during the Manny game), and Mike Pelfrey’s incarceration following the murder of SI’s Tom Verducci.

Prediction #7: Sometime in September — oh god, you don’t want to hear this, do you?

Prediction #8: Sometime in October, in the midst of a World Series interview with Joe Buck, Mark Texeira will mumble, “I’ve always wanted to be a Met.” The following day, in the middle of a World Series interview with Joe Buck, Manny Ramirez will mumble, “I really thought I was gonna be a Met back in February.”

Prediction #9: Sometime in November, Omar will begin serious pursuit of both Roy Halladay and Matt Holliday. However, after a heated meeting with the Wilpons and Jay Horowitz, he will be notified that the two similar-sounding surnames would cause untenable travel logistics issues. “I still have nightmares about the Bobby Joneses,” Horowitz will whine. Omar will be told to cease his pursuit of both.

Prediction #10: Sometime in December, the Winter Meetings will conclude with Omar “very pleased” to have inked free agent Carlos Delgado to a 6-year, $122M contract. “Merry Christmas, Mets fans!” Minaya will shout. “God Bless America,” Delgado will quip.